I’m sick and I’m in a really weird mood where I feel like I can’t do anything? I want to write for my dcbb but I’m frustrated with myself, I almost just want to go to bed and cry maybe? this weekend was fun, but so draining ugh.
I HAVE AN AMY!!!!!
I made a scared post about signing up for the deancas big bang but apparently it didn’t post?
anyway, I’m scared and I don’t even know if I have something to write but I HAD SUCH A GREAT EXPERIENCE LAST YEAR THAT I NEED TO TRY AGAIN YES GOOD.
afraid to go to sleep now so I wrote another deancas poem thing oops.
hit my head pretty bad at work today. right on the corner of a drawer. had to go to the hospital and get it checked out. no concussion, but gotta watch out in case i start puking or my headache gets worse. gonna order some pizza goddamnit.
responded to some asks, but I still can’t reply to anon ones without going through some hassle, but I did get your msgs!! if anyone has figured out how to make anon replies work again, that’d be great to know…
anyway, I’m back home now yay, probably gonna sit around and play sims and stuff, but thanks for all your kind words guys! it was very much appreciated!!
So all the funeral stuff is over now. I’ll be heading back home tomorrow. I was friggin exhausted during the service because I had to stay overnight with my uncle’s body. Apparently this isn’t a tradition that other people have, but here when someone dies, someone has to stay with them all the time, and it must be someone in their immediate family. So I volunteered to stay for the whole night, only got about two hours of sleep before I had to go back for the funeral.
And omg, I wanted to scream at the guy who led the service, my great-uncle. He runs a born-again Christian church in our community, which is fine, believe what you believe and my uncle believed in that, but what bothered me was that he was using my uncle’s service as an attempt to sermon us and tell us that “there is a God-shaped hole in your heart” and “you only have two choices, heaven or hell.” and I just wanted to yell at him. Like, when you’re there for a funeral for your own nephew, that’s who you should be focusing on. Honoring that person the way they wanted to be honored. Not trying to shove your religion down all of our throats. He spoke for maybe 5 minutes about my uncle, and then spent 15 telling us we were all going to hell if we didn’t believe the same exact things that he did.
Anyway, I’m glad it’s all over. Gonna spend tomorrow with my mom and my aunt. There was some good moments in this whole crazy thing and that’s what I’m gonna remember most, that and my uncle and all the good times I had with him.
“She’s married to one of those men that’s half horse, right?”
“No, mom. Khal Drogo is not a centaur.”
“Oh. So he’s just hung like a horse?”
Dear mother.
today was a long day. everyone in the family seems to be taking it well so far but I know it’s gonna get really bad once the actual services start. what bothers me is that we’re having it at my grandfather’s house, just like when my grandfather died and it’s gonna be the same style and it’ll be just like last year and it’s scary. but I’ll be okay. I’m pretty sure I’ll be okay.